FOCUS ON MARRIED LIFE NOT THE WEDDING DAY

The wedding ceremony of today has become an event filled with lots of pomp and peagentry. In fact, wedding ceremonies have mostly turned to jamborees whereby families of both the husband and wife try to outdo each other on who spent what or provided what at the event.

The preparation of the ceremony is usually taken very seriously by families and the couples involved are usually carried away by it so much so that they overlook the most important thing which is life after the wedding.

However, many couples have overlooked red flags of their partner because of their overzealousness to be walked down the aisle in a fairy tale kind of wedding ceremony, imagining that after the ceremony it would be the usual ‘happily-ever-after’. Yet, terrible red flags don’t desist from coming up even on the wedding day and nobody cares; not even the family of the bride or the groom. Many brides have shed painful tears and were reluctant to go on with the ceremony at the last minute, but no one takes time to care about what the problem really is. This careless behavior has led to unhappy marriages and uncountable divorce.

Intended couples should, however, focus less on the wedding ceremony but look critically into their compatibility as a couple because it would go a long way in married life. Couples shouldn’t bow to the pressure of what their parents and other family members want in the name of celebrating their union cause immediately after the ceremony comes married life which basically involves just the two of them. Couples should equally be aware that it is not how lavish or crowded their ceremony is that would guarantee a successful married life, but how rock solid the foundation of the relationship that would make the marriage stand the test of time. Interestingly, studies have shown that less expensive and crowded weddings turn out to be the most blissful marriages.

Dear Parents, it’s true you mean well for your kids and are proud that your kids are about to start their own family life, thereby the need to celebrate them on their wedding day, but please don’t overdo it. Allow your children to choose for themselves what they want, whether a simple wedding or an elaborate one. There is really nothing wrong in an elaborate wedding if you can afford it and if it is what the couple wants, but if it is something you or they can’t afford, please encourage your children to do a wedding within their budget limit.

What parents should be more interested in should be the well being and happiness of their children after the ceremony and not the ceremony itself. Many poor parents have married their children off in lavish weddings ending up owing huge debts they may not be able to pay in their lifetime. The newly married couple also end up starting their life together in debts and penury which usually robs off negatively on their marital life. Parents wise up! Rather than waste money on a day ceremony which doesn’t add any value to the couple’s marital life materially, why not invest the money in the couple’s future and see how it would go a long way? Those who attend the wedding don’t care about the couple, they are there to enjoy the free meal and show, be wise.

Peach & Pear Counsel